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I lost my job again.
It happened the same time last year, right before the House finale.
I feel like such a failure. Apparently I suck as a teacher, failed to keep the kids safe, didn't keep the room up to date with their work, or do 1000 other different things.
I have to finish out the year once again, in a place that doesn't want me.
I have no idea what I am going to do in the future. I have no skills other than teaching; I haven't even come remotely close to paying off my loans.
I'm terrified, depressed, and I just have no idea what I am going to do now.
It happened the same time last year, right before the House finale.
I feel like such a failure. Apparently I suck as a teacher, failed to keep the kids safe, didn't keep the room up to date with their work, or do 1000 other different things.
I have to finish out the year once again, in a place that doesn't want me.
I have no idea what I am going to do in the future. I have no skills other than teaching; I haven't even come remotely close to paying off my loans.
I'm terrified, depressed, and I just have no idea what I am going to do now.
no subject
Date: 2009-05-06 08:02 pm (UTC)If teaching is what you want...you just need to find a place that fits you. I've worked at three schools, and I know that two of those schools were not "me". The third one was and it felt like home. Maybe you just haven't found "home" yet.
Good luck to you. Trust that you are not a failure. Don't think that way. There may be extenuating circumstances that you aren't aware of (budget stuff) and they may have needed to cut back and used any excuse to do it.
no subject
Date: 2009-05-06 08:20 pm (UTC)It is just so hard to go through this a second time in a year.
I'm not sure about staying in teaching at this point. I don't know if I can go through something like this again, and I am not sure my recommendations (what few I have) are good enough to get a job in a tough economy.
no subject
Date: 2009-05-06 08:30 pm (UTC)Have you considered a desk job? That's where I'm headed. I can type, I can answer phones and I'm willing to take computer classes if need be. Not great, but it's better than nothing at this point.
Well, and your other option really, is to substitute. Work in the schools, get to know the staff and sometimes that leads to a placement, especially if you're there at the start of the school year when things aren't always settled. You may find a place you really want to be at, and even if not, you can request recommendations from the teachers/principals you work for, particularly if you take a long term sub position.
no subject
Date: 2009-05-06 08:38 pm (UTC)